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I just want to do my work and hate this stuff about selling and money
I just had a conversation that may sound really familiar to you. This fantastic, talented, big-hearted healer was saying: “I just want to do my healing and spiritual work and hate all this stuff about selling and money!”
Don’t you resonate? I sure do; even though I’m really good at helping other people with their business, I’m in the same boat; I would love to “just do my coaching and not have to worry about selling and money.” That’s one of the things I loved about the Star Trek series way back when; they never had to worry about money! People did their work and went on with their lives 
.
This is a big issue for most of us and one that can’t be resolved in one article, post or conversation, but I’d like to make 5 suggestions:
- To very loosely paraphrase Buddhism, we can lessen our suffering through acceptance and detachment.
Accepting that being in business in our society means having to sell and trade money.
Accepting that everyone has money issues and that we will be on the receiving end of some of “their stuff” and detaching from the sting of what that feels like.Yes I know, easier said then done but when I remember to remember this, I’m able to take more action and feel less stress.
- One common mistake most of us make is that we are self-focused, and that’s the case even for giving practitioners or coaches who want to make a difference in the world.
You see, we love our processes: they are fascinating, soul-enhancing, health-inducing. So we talk about them and hope to convey to others the power of our tools.
Since other people aren’t interested in our tools, they tune us out especially if we use specialized lingo (which doesn’t sound specialized to us since we live it every day). I’m not only referring to health terms here, but also to coach-ese, new age-ese, or spiritual-ese.
Instead, we should relate to them in their language, talking about their problems. Now that’s a conversation that would be interesting to them and to top it off, it naturally flows into how we can help. Doesn’t that feel better than a sales pitch?
- Remembering that people want a solution to their problems also allows you to feel more welcome and more confident. Doesn’t it feel better to think that you are reaching out to lessen people’s burden, than to think that you’re selling something to them?
- The dark side of being caring is forgetting that it is their decision whether to move forward with anything including our services. Now you might think that this sentence doesn’t apply to you but let me ask you; why do you take it so personally if they reject your offer? Yes I know, it’s darn frustrating when your work isn’t being valued and you need to eat and pay your bills. Fact is, most people won’t be able or willing to hire us, which means we have to keep reaching out to many more people to find the ones who just happen to be ready to act.
- Reaching out with our message is one thing, quoting a price is another. Now that rattles our money and self-worth issues! I’m not an expert on that topic (well, I am an expert in the discomfort of it but not the solution
). I have come across a few people who do a very good job on this issue. One program that is coming up (and repeats every so often if you’re reading this post later on) is called “Transformational Fee Setting”. Isn’t that title intriguing?
Intriguing enough that I’ve signed up; I can always use help in operating on a higher ground when it comes to money, as long as what they recommend is practical in today’s world. I’d recommend you explore for yourself if this suits your needs by going to the transformational fee setting program page.
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Comments
I keep my business and charitable work separate in my life. I am worth being paid for my professional products and services; I choose to donate my time and money to help others in need.
When you think about it in this way, you can see that you need to earn money to finance the life you have chosen for yourself and those around you. Think about some of the most generous philanthropists you have heard of;each of them has no problem charging market rates for their products and services.
This is such a common issue with people who sell their services in ’soft’ areas. When clients perceive our value, they readily pay.
Thank you, Helene, for your insight and warmth. I’ve always found it interesting when people feel that money is something dirty, when in actuality it is just a way of keeping score, like the chips in a poker tournament.
May the abundance flow freeing and joyfully your way!
Thank you, Helene. Your article is very good and insightful and all of the comments people made support what you wrote.
Isn’t it ironic that we can see the value others provide yet be blind to the value we provide to others?
Isn’t it ironic that we can see the value others provide yet be blind to the value we provide to others?
My fee is my harvest. The client or patient is my field.
I plant in them the best I have to give and They decide
on the correct harvest for them. Since I need lights, phone
food and a roof over my head, I don’t have a problem
with setting fees. I don’t mind giving some things free
either. I have a free coaching offer open now, but I can only
do that for brief periods occasionally. If they move on
then the price was small compared to being stuck
in a bad place.