I have another one: working with people I enjoy, respect and truly understand.

Many business people and entrepreneurs are “kind” and I love to interact with all of them. I have a special understanding of the gifts and challenges of those who are either introverts, intuitive, reserved, and/or sensitive (attuned to others’ feelings and thoughts).

If you’re wondering about the website title “Where Business Meets Spirit”, it came from a conversation with someone who described how I work, sensing a person’s true personality, wishes and spirit while always strategizing about  the practicality of getting results.

The details about what I do on this page . Glad you’re here!

Or I feel sad or worried for loved ones’ plight or for the ills of the world.

Inspiring music is always uplifting for me as is my love of nature and animals and I found this video that combines one of Bruce Mitchell’s beautiful songs from his recent CD (New Earth Goddess.net) with the most amazing nature scenes! Reduce your stress; enjoy true beauty!

• Knowing your purpose is something that is nice, but not essential.
• Instead of navel gazing, we would be better off picking a vision and a goal and just do it!
• Purpose talk often sounds like splitting hairs, especially when it talks about improving various aspects of our character (e.g. being more compassionate, or more loving)
• A lot of it feels rather vague (I’m meant to integrate the masculine and the feminine)
• And self-absorbed

Doesn’t sound like world-changing stuff, does it?

Well, it is, and here’s why.

When you are on purpose, everything makes more sense. You see how your past story contributes to your growth.

And contrary to the accusation that purpose work makes you self absorbed, you are more forgiving and generous because you don’t want to sweat the small stuff. You also know that others have a different purpose than you which may create a different point of view…and that’s ok; you can live and let live.

One of my mentors, Tim Kelley is the CEO of True Purpose Coaching and he’s been working with heads of corporations and heads of state, helping them find their personal and their organizational purpose, knowing that doing so will help create a better world.

Why?

The live and let live attitude of someone on purpose applies to organizations as well. Not only that, the process he uses to find your purpose puts you in touch with your deepest Divine guidance, and that guidance will not direct you to act in a way that will harm others.

Sound impossible or too idealistic; what do you think?

If you’re not reading this blog post at a later date, you might be interested in hearing Tim talk about the state of the world and what can be done. He is giving a free talk March 1st at 3PM ET. Here is the link to get the telephone number.

• My love of animals
• The fact that we need to be who we are rather than try to mold ourselves into what we “should” be, and that’s for our own happiness and because we’ll be much more successful that way.

It’s not possible to put the video on my site but you’ll see it if you click on this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGODurRfVv4 .

You won’t regret taking the time! Actually you should do it especially if you feel overwhelmed right now.

You’ll take a breath, sink into yourself and reduce your overwhelm either by changing what you do or what you think.

Let me know what you think of it!

Don’t you resonate? I sure do; even though I’m really good at helping other people with their business, I’m in the same boat; I would love to “just do my coaching and not have to worry about selling and money.” That’s one of the things I loved about the Star Trek series way back when; they never had to worry about money! People did their work and went on with their lives .

This is a big issue for most of us and one that can’t be resolved in one article, post or conversation, but I’d like to make 5 suggestions:

• To very loosely paraphrase Buddhism, we can lessen our suffering through acceptance and detachment.

  Accepting that being in business in our society means having to sell and trade money.
  Accepting that everyone has money issues and that we will be on the receiving end of some of “their stuff” and detaching from the sting of what that feels like.

  Yes I know, easier said then done but when I remember to remember this, I’m able to take more action and feel less stress.

• One common mistake most of us make is that we are self-focused, and that’s the case even for giving practitioners or coaches who want to make a difference in the world.

  You see, we love our processes: they are fascinating, soul-enhancing, health-inducing. So we talk about them and hope to convey to others the power of our tools.

  Since other people aren’t interested in our tools, they tune us out especially if we use specialized lingo (which doesn’t sound specialized to us since we live it every day). I’m not only referring to health terms here, but also to coach-ese, new age-ese, or spiritual-ese.

  Instead, we should relate to them in their language, talking about their problems. Now that’s a conversation that would be interesting to them and to top it off, it naturally flows into how we can help. Doesn’t that feel better than a sales pitch?

• Remembering that people want a solution to their problems also allows you to feel more welcome and more confident. Doesn’t it feel better to think that you are reaching out to lessen people’s burden, than to think that you’re selling something to them?
• The dark side of being caring is forgetting that it is their decision whether to move forward with anything including our services. Now you might think that this sentence doesn’t apply to you but let me ask you; why do you take it so personally if they reject your offer? Yes I know, it’s darn frustrating when your work isn’t being valued and you need to eat and pay your bills.  Fact is, most people won’t be able or willing to hire us, which means we have to keep reaching out to many more people to find the ones who just happen to be ready to act.
• Reaching out with our message is one thing, quoting a price is another. Now that rattles our money and self-worth issues! I’m not an expert on that topic (well, I am an expert in the discomfort of it but not the solution ). I have come across a few people who do a very good job on this issue. One program that is coming up (and repeats every so often if you’re reading this post later on) is called “Transformational Fee Setting”. Isn’t that title intriguing?

  
  

  Intriguing enough that I’ve signed up; I can always use help in operating on a higher ground when it comes to money, as long as what they recommend is  practical in today’s world. I’d recommend you explore for yourself if this suits your needs by going to the transformational fee setting program page.

These were points made by best-selling author Sonia Miller in a recent teleseminar, the first of a 3-part free series called the “Ultimate Manifestation”. Now I’ve explained them in my own words and if you are interested in the Law of Attraction and why it doesn’t always work, I recommend that you sign up for the recordings (and the next two classes).

She gave a lot of other good information in the first class alone, such as:

• 3 ways to overcome confusion, overwhelm and inertia
• 3 ways to get Universal energy on your side

Again, here’s my link to her free series.

There are a number of popular techniques designed to help you ground yourself which you’ve likely heard:

• Visualizing chords connecting the center of the earth with your spine and the bottom of your feet
• Just setting the intention of grounding yourself
• Walking barefoot on the ground
• Sitting against a tree
• Doing a walking meditation
• Walking in nature

Here’s a couple more that you might not have heard as often:

• Imagine spurs coming out of your heels, and visualize them grinding themselves in the soil while you take a sumo wrestler stance. (OK, you don’t have to exaggerate the posture that much, but it’s fun to visualize you doing it. The point is to get our gravity center lower to the ground.)
• Look around you and start counting how many kinds of shapes you can see. For example, the street light is one shape, a leaf is another, the tree trunk a third, the cloud a fourth, and so on. Doing this brings your mind back to the physical world while keeping it happy counting things.

Now when asking you to be more grounded, some people are really talking about wishing that your ideas were more practical. That’s not quite the same as what I’m talking about, though it is often an outcome of grounding yourself.

First, you have to bring your attention back to your body because that is the vehicle through which you experience the world. When your thoughts and your body work together, you have a much better chance of being an entrepreneur that makes good decisions, practical plans, and successful actions.

This summer we’ve had a lot of daddy-long-legs (a type of spider) in the bathroom. Who knows why; maybe there was a nest in the laundry conduits.

I used to have major spider phobia and though I’m no longer as bad, I still find that they give me the creeps and I’d rather not share my indoor space with one.

I found a good way to get rid of them without having to kill them: I give them a ride outside on the bristle end of a broom.

Getting them to climb on the broom hasn’t always been easy. The spiders run for their lives, until they are cornered and then have to walk on the broom.

It’s been taking too long and out of desparation (killing them also gives me the creeps, and I prefer not to kill anyway if I can avoid it), I’ve taken to talking with them lately: “I’m not going to kill you; just get on the broom and you’ll be safe.” And wouldn’t you know it, as soon as I say this, they hop on the bristles!

Hum…a few coincidences in a row.

Well the last couple of times I talked to them before extending the broom out and they didn’t run away but climbed on their ride pronto; a few seconds and we were done!

Wow; serial coincidences!

So why am I taking your time to tell you this?

Maybe the spider behavior is a coincidence that keeps happening, and maybe not. But it most certainly reminds me of the power of stating our intentions and directing goodwill at another person.

Dr. Srikumar Rao, a popular professor at some of the best business schools in the world, gives an exercise to students of his Personal Mastery course, asking them to silently direct goodwill to others as they interact with them during the day.

Many students have reported that this exercise has dramatically changed the quality of their relationships.

Remember, these weren’t new agers, coaches, or energy healers. They were business school students bent on climbing to the top of the establishment ladder.

Wish they had that course when I took my MBA!!

Most sensitives would tell you that it’s been difficult functioning in our mainly action-oriented, fast-paced and attention-seeking culture and business world. For example, sensitive persons would tend to:

• Find confrontations difficult since they feel their impact many more times than another person, and since business often involves negotiating, that places them at a disadvantage
• Take on a protective role as leaders which is a great quality unless the leader ends up sacrificing too much in the process. That happened when a manager allocated himself a 0% salary increase 5 years in a row because he felt his staff was underpaid and wanted to do what he could to remedy the injustice.
• Misread other people’s meanings since a sensitive spots small changes in facial expressions and voice intonations. The customer may not be as angry as you think…or angry at all!
• Undersell because they think they portray emotion or enthusiasm but the listener may not “get it” because the communication is too subtle for the average person.
• Be drained because their nervous system is on constant alert, and because they have to deal with not only their own emotions but also the ones they pick up from people around them.

As you can see, sensitive people need tools to handle these challenges and maximize the unique opportunities their nature provides.

And I mean something else besides being told to “get a thicker skin”, or “not care as much” or “get a less responsible job”.

Hum….as I said in my reply to a comment to September 3rd’s post, I feel a personal mission brewing and am considering creating something to support sensitive people in business. What do you think; do you see a need for it?

Traditionally, that trait is viewed as a negative, as something that must be overcome. But that point of view overlooks that being sensitive is also a gift.

Here are 5 of the ways in which sensitivity serves a business owner or manager well:

• A sensitive person tends to have a higher level of empathy, which means that he will treat people as he wants to be treated. As a result, he’ll be trusted by his employees, peers, and clients.

• Being highly attuned to other people’s reaction, the sensitive executive will be able to factor the human element in her decisions. For example, she would foresee that an announcement about the purchase of another company will create uncertainty amongst the staff about their jobs and take steps to reassure them while still being completely honest. As a result, she’ll improve both morale and productivity.

• Having their antenna up and naturally scanning their environment, sensitive people will see faster than others the undercurrents of situations. They make great advisors in negotiations for example.

• Sensitivity is a great asset for teachers, trainers, and coaches, because you will know what your clients think before they can verbalize for themselves, and will become renowned for their ability to help people clarify their confusion.

• Sensitive persons are tuned-in to other realms besides the action-oriented physical reality, so they tend to have high intuition and out-of-the-box thinking. Not bad traits in a quick-changing economy requiring creativity to survive.

Now we all know that sensitivity is not something that’s traditionally been prized in a resume. There are many reasons for this, some valid and some not, and I’ll go over five of the downsides of the trait in the next post.